I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize