So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize