You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize