You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
