So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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