I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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