Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
