u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
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I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
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Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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