My brain says no but my pants say off.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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