do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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