We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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