my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
