Your dad touched me again.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
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I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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