I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Randomize
