office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
