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my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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