What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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