You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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