she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I'm both gender and math confused
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
