Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Can I color on your dick again?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
