That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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