OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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