he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
