I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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