I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
how drunk are you?
Several
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
