I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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