so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Mom said you looked used
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
