you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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