I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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