does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
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Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
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Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
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