He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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