You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
