I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
