Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
