I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Randomize
