a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize