it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
