the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
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