I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Drunk is not a location!
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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