i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
