i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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