I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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