Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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