i don't want you to think of me as your TA
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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