theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize