So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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