Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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