This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
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Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
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I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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