There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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