Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
