Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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