she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
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I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
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Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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